Long Without a Tribe

+ACY-nbsp+ADs There must be others like me. Where are they? It took me more than three decades to even ask this question. The journey began on Father's Day, 1975, when I asked my dad if had ever been unfaithful to Mom. He'd always been a shameless flirter. I was 24. He stunned me by … [Read more...]

I Will Be Your Family

Our topic this month is family. Before the election, I'd have written about my family of origin, friends from childhood, and supportive tribes of like-minded souls. Not today, though. The election has triggered too many feelings in me. I see the world through that filter right now. Bigotry in … [Read more...]

Dear Laura, Nothing’s Wrong With You

Dear 17-year-old Laura, I know you're having a hard time right now. What's worse, you don't understand why. After all, you're getting good grades at school. You've been accepted at UC Santa Barbara for next fall. You're kind of cute. Boys are interested in you. You're interested in … [Read more...]

#icangive: Transmitting my Family’s Experience

Times feel scary for many of us right now. Terrorism, violence, hate crimes, all amplified through their real-time dissemination on social media, keep us on edge. What can we do? For LGBT people who've lived with targets on their backs, times have generally felt scary. The slaying of 49 … [Read more...]

A Home for My Pride

June??is National LGBT Pride Month. Given the complexity of my family's story, I've??been asking myself what pride means to me. First, some background. My father (1918-2008) may have attended the first gay pride parade in San Francisco, which was really more of a march. That smaller version of … [Read more...]