My last big question of Dad

Mom had been gone for two years. We lost my little sister in 1979. My remaining siblings were out of town. Today it was just Dad and me. It was June, 2008. He'd turned 90 that March. Even though I was by then middle-aged, and had long known my father was gay, I still clung to a childhood … [Read more...]

A Hallmark Moment

From the time I was an adolescent, buying a Father's Day card for my dad was always challenging. Rows upon rows of greetings depicting fishing poles, cars, and remote controls pointed at football games didn't represent my dad at all. Neither did flowery messages about how much he means to me and … [Read more...]

Progress Is In the Details

Something happened during the commercial break, as people were touching up my makeup and tugging on my clothes. Someone said, bring her dad up here at what felt like the same time as someone else pulled my dad from the audience and brought him backstage. He was already mic-ed, because he was going … [Read more...]

Laughter

When I started doing standup I had not planned on telling any jokes about my father. Prior to that experience I had a long history of being a comedic actress and writer, but I never used my personal life as material. I thought it was exploitive. I've never been a fan of reality-based … [Read more...]

The Glass Closet

When I think of closets, I think of them as dark hiding places. I think of isolation. I think of lacking air. I am not gay, so I don't know what the closet is like for my father who is. I can only tell you what it's like to see his coming out, a process that to this day is incomplete. It is a … [Read more...]