Hey Dad, Happy Pride

Hey Dad, It was Father's Day last week, and Mark and I were in France after a couple weeks in Italy. I thought of you while I walked along the French Riviera in search of some shade, thinking you would appreciate the beauty for about five minutes then complain of the heat and look for an air … [Read more...]

I wanted you to have a father

My mother had known for decades that Dad was gay. He told me so in 1975 when he came out to me. It would be another decade before I had the nerve to ask Mom why she stayed. She was someone who shied away from difficult questions. But at a family gathering sometime in the 1990s, I found the … [Read more...]

A Hallmark Moment

From the time I was an adolescent, buying a Father's Day card for my dad was always challenging. Rows upon rows of greetings depicting fishing poles, cars, and remote controls pointed at football games didn't represent my dad at all. Neither did flowery messages about how much he means to me and … [Read more...]

Long Without a Tribe

There must be others like me. Where are they? It took me more than three decades to even ask this question. The journey began on Father's Day, 1975, when I asked my dad if had ever been unfaithful to Mom. He'd always been a shameless flirter. I was 24. He stunned me by answering a … [Read more...]

I Will Be Your Family

Our topic this month is family. Before the election, I'd have written about my family of origin, friends from childhood, and supportive tribes of like-minded souls. Not today, though. The election has triggered too many feelings in me. I see the world through that filter right now. Bigotry in … [Read more...]