I wanted you to have a father

My mother had known for decades that Dad was gay. He told me so in 1975 when he came out to me. It would be another decade before I had the nerve to ask Mom why she stayed. She was someone who shied away from difficult questions. But at a family gathering sometime in the 1990s, I found the … [Read more...]

A Hallmark Moment

From the time I was an adolescent, buying a Father's Day card for my dad was always challenging. Rows upon rows of greetings depicting fishing poles, cars, and remote controls pointed at football games didn't represent my dad at all. Neither did flowery messages about how much he means to me and … [Read more...]

Why I Write Now

When I was 12 years old, my schoolteacher suggested I enter a writing competition. It was sponsored by the local branch of the American Legion. The prize was a +ACQ-25 gift certificate, for Woolworth's, I think. Academic achievement was a big deal in my family, especially for my father who doled … [Read more...]

Sisters From Other Gay Misters

I want to say meeting another person with a gay dad is like looking into a mirror, but even in a mirror I cannot properly see myself. It???s more like finding out your father has this other family and now you???re meeting relatives you did not know you had. You are different people with different … [Read more...]

Long Without a Tribe

There must be others like me. Where are they? It took me more than three decades to even ask this question. The journey began on Father's Day, 1975, when I asked my dad if had ever been unfaithful to Mom. He'd always been a shameless flirter. I was 24. He stunned me by answering a … [Read more...]